My grandma and mum always used to tell me in Greek, “To mialo einai orimo otan eisai 25.” That literally means that your brain is ripe at 25. So basically, you’re a full blown adult at 25. They always used to laugh at the fact that legally we were “adults” at 18 and I was always like, “But muuuum, I aaaam an adult!” Yeah right!

Now that I am 25 plus 2, I see the difference. I totally, whole heartedly, cross my heart and hope to die-ily believe that my brain ‘ripened’ a tonne at the 25 mark and beyond. At the moment, I’m kind of in ‘adult cruise control.’ I’m at a stage where I’ve accepted that I’m grown and that I don’t have to be friends with everyone. However, last year and the year before, I was very confused as to why my life was changing so much. But now I see why.

My friendships changed

I lost so many friends. People were somewhat good for me at some stage in my life. You have fun with these people, you go through things with them, you start getting annoyed by them and then you get to an age where you’re like, “this isn’t real, I’m out homie.” I used to say ‘yes’ to everyone, I would go out of my way for everyone and when I took a step back to see if they would put in as much effort if I pulled back-I learnt the truth. It’s hard at first, but us oldies always say: “It’s quality over quantity.” Now I’ve got my real ride or dies, hunnay.

Saving money is important

I used to, (And kind of still do…), pay too much for other people and go out too much. I now realise that you save so much money if you cut down the dinners, if you say ‘no’ to a couple things and if you avoid socializing with people who like to make your generous ass pay for them, more often than not.
I love shouting people, it’s part of my culture and genetic makeup, but at this stage, I know who’s worth the generosity and who uses me.
I don’t want to be as embarrassing and stingy as the people who play dumb at the till, forget cash, forget their card and have “no money”; but are wearing $800 reading glasses from Italy. Saving money is so important and socializing doesn’t have to be as expensive as when we first gained our independence.

You don’t actually need a face full of make-up and styled hair to go to Coles

Yep, I could never leave the house without make-up on my face, even if it was to go fill my car up! I used to care so much about how people would see me! I think part of letting go of caring so much comes with gaining an attitude of “this is me, whatever!” Also, finding someone who loves you for you, realizing that make up is bad for you and having no freaking time also helps.

You know what you want

I know what I want in a relationship, friendship and job. I don’t let myself get treated badly by friends. I will never let myself get bullied. At work, you best believe I’m on my emailing A-game. Have it all in writing, stand up for yourself and stay out of drama. My classroom is my safe place, I have one person I can trust at work and students are what I focus on. No one and nothing else. I spent too many years trying to please everyone. Unnecessary!

Oh and you best believe, there’s no man out there who will ever play me again. I’m done with that, I’m done with games and actually, I got married after gaining the attitude of, “You’re playing games? I’m gone.” You start to know your worth and become confident in the fact that you’re a catch and you’re too smart to be played. It is just so demeaning to be treated like a fool and I refuse to let anyone do that to me anymore. Mhm, girl. Cue the eye roll and the, “You’re a feminist.” Yeah I am, sit down.

 

There are so many other things that have changed. I’ve grown into myself and am definitely continuing to do so. It was hard at first when I started realizing all the changes and some harsh truths that came with them. However looking back, I don’t regret anything and I’m not afraid to move on from anything or anyone. (Anymore.)
We should be comfortable with ourselves, we’re smart and we’ve been through too much to be phased by anyone or anything. I stand up for myself and I hope you do too. If you don’t, you’re missing out. Be unapologetically you, with tact and kindness. I don’t regret anything and I’m loving getting to know myself as the years go by. Living more confidently is a blessing and you get so much more out of life.

What has changed for you as you’ve gotten older?

Lots of love,

Magda xx